I downloaded the Family Talk app which is DR James Dobson. The broadcast series I was listening to was called Hope for Hurting Hearts, the guest speaker was Pastor Greg Laurie. He spoke about loosing his son in a car accident, his son was active in the church and had a wife and young daughter. They quoted some scripture that really spoke to me. Matthew 5:4 says "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." I'm learning that it's ok to mourn, and it's ok to be angry Ephesians 4:26 "'In your anger do not sin' Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry". I'm giving it all to Him, I can't heal without His love and promises. His promise in Isaiah 42:2 says "When you pass through the waters I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." He has promised to "never leave me or forsake me" Deut. 31:6 and "he will give me the desires of my heart" Psalm 37:4. Hannah prayed to God to bless her with a child and he granted her the desires of her heart. "For this child I prayed and The Lord has granted me what I asked of him" 1 Samuel 1:27. I'm trusting and believing and putting all my faith in Him.
I'm tired, I'm broken, and I'm beat down; but all those feelings come from the devil. The divil is there trying to keep me down, trying to make me question my God and everything he is capable of. But I will not let him break me down anymore, I am a child of God and He is capable of great things, He has blessed me beyond measure and for that I am greatful.
One of the students from our Wednesday night class came forward this morning, I'm ashamed to say that I'm not in a place spiritually that I felt I could pray with her... God is still working on me and I pray that soon I will get to that point again.