Thursday, December 1, 2011

Cleaning House...

Facebook is a great place to keep in touch with old friends or family in another state but for me it’s become a place to know what other people are up to… and they make it soooo easy to know everything that’s going on in their lives. Here is my complaint; I am friends with people that I knew in the past, people that were not nice (only to preserve feelings). When Chance and I decided to start dating we immediately hit it off, by the 3rd date I knew that there could be something real and lasting between us.  I was attending a church that I had been introduced to through my family when I was 16, so for 6 years those people were my friends. We laughed together, cried together, we traveled together, they helped me through some really tough times and I did the same. So when I met the man that I now call my husband I was so happy, God had finally answered my prayers and sent me the most wonderful man, from our first date we had a connection. We talked about what we both wanted out of life and surprisingly it was the same. We dated for 6 months and he asked me to marry him so naturally I said yes! By this point Chance and I knew that after we were married we would move to Berryville where he was from to help out his parents. So when I told my “friends” from my “church family” I was not met with the reaction I was expecting, I ended up leaving the church 2 days after we were engaged and I have not been back. After that I wasn’t sure that I wanted to get involved in church like that again, I thought that if the people I had known and had been friends with for the past 5 years completely abandoned me during the happiest time of my life thus far what was the point in trying to do that all over again… I was just glad to have the friends that really cared for me and were my friends no matter what and stood by my decision, of course they weren’t happy I was moving but they were happy I was happy. They were the ones that stood by me when I said “I do” (some were watching from the pew) but they were there!! I also found a new church family; Chance introduced me to an amazing group of people and an awesome church. We have become involved in the ministry and we wouldn’t trade it. We always said the move here to Berryville would be temporary but I honestly don’t think we will move back to Fayetteville, we have found an amazing church and we don’t ever see ourselves leaving, I’m sure we will raise our children here. We both have grown closer to God and our relationship with him just gets better. So now it brings me to the reason for my Facebook comment from earlier, every time I log on and see posts form certain people excited about getting engaged, or getting married or having a baby, and they get to be excited and those people are sharing in their excitement, I feel anger and resentment. How is it fair that they get to be happy for these joyous occasions but they are the ones who stole my joy… they stole my happiness… I was crushed by people I trusted. They never spoke to me again and it really hurts. But it’s time to move on, I can’t keep holding onto this resentment and anger I must let it go. So I am cleaning house, my Facebook will be place to check on the people that mean the most to me not people who treated me badly and judged me harshly. Chance and I will be married 2 years on December 5th and I just want to say how amazing being married is, it truly is something that God has given us. We are so blessed to have each other and I can’t imagine my life with out him, I am so glad I answered that Facebook message 3 years ago from a man who I had met a few times at work and knew really nothing about, but I took a “chance” (hehe) and I found my soul mate. I encourage you to “clean house” if there are things in your life that are causing you grief or pain, or causing you to feel angry or resentful get rid of it. Pray about it and God will help you get over it.

Ashley

2 comments:

Phyllisnana2two said...

I'm sorry for what you have been through, but I agree that you do not need to hold on to anger & resentment because that hurts no one except YOU! I am very proud that you and Chance found each other, you seem very happy. Keep loving the Lord and each other and you will be fine.
Love, Phyllis

Phyllisnana2two said...

It should say Phyllisnana2four but that was taken!